The meaning of ink

I am not a spontaneous person. When I make a decision, you can bet I have thought of every possible outcome, every possible consequence, and every possible scenario where it could back fire on me. Some people may call it overthinking… I prefer to call it proactive thinking

So when I get a tattoo, it is not an errant idea. One that pops up into my head like a random passerby. It has been well thought out, percolating in my mind for months if not years. After all, that’s how long I’ll be stuck with it.¬†54d1b62db84615cb2e4e220d1ff4d550

I got my first tattoo 5 years ago after struggling with severe anxiety. I made a decision and had “No Fear” inked on my ribcage, telling everyone – including myself – that while anxiety may be a part of my life, fear isn’t. It can’t be.

I carried that message with me when I began writing my first novel. Writing is not for the faint of heart. You must strip down everything that makes you who you are and lay it out naked while others try to light it on fire.

It would be so much easier to chicken out.

But then I reminded myself to have “no fear,” and I searched for a way to sign a self-binding contract to never give up on this dream of mine to become an author. I found myself in the tattoo parlor once more.

You should crn4kfmukaarwnahave seen the guy’s face when I asked for a box…

As any expert knows, tattoos are profoundly personal, but I still feel compelled to explain. When State of Grace is published – and only then – I will return to check the box.

How embarrassing would it be if in twenty years I still have just a box on my arm? A reminder of what could have been, what I gave up on.

So I am forging ahead. With no fear.

 

 

2 thoughts on “The meaning of ink

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